Fibromyalgia 101

Fibromyalgia Awareness Day is this Friday, May 12, and part of spreading awareness is educating people about the condition. Now I know anyone can search Google or WebMD, but a list of symptoms doesn’t give the whole picture. I feel that fibromyalgia is better explained by those who live with it. With that said, as a fibro fighter, I’ll do my best to provide information and descriptions that will help people better understand this illness.

The Basics

Fibromyalgia is a chronic illness that causes widespread pain. It is diagnosed in women and men, and contrary to what many believe, people of any age can have fibro. In addition to pain, the main symptoms of fibromyalgia are fatigue, cognitive difficulties (referred to as “fibro fog”), sensitivity to light and sound, irritable bowel syndrome, sleep disturbances, and migraines. There is no cure and the cause is not yet known.

Pain

Fibromyalgia pain is difficult to explain. The pain is mainly in our muscles and joints, but it can literally radiate from the top of our heads to the tips of our toes. (Oh, how I wish I were exaggerating). We feel throbbing pain, shooting pain, and sharp pain; severe pain, moderate pain, and dull pain. Let’s say you fell down a flight of stairs. You didn’t break any bones, but you have a couple sprains are severely bruised all over your body. You can’t bend down and can barely lift anything. It hurts so much to walk that you need a cane. You stay in bed but you can’t get comfortable because the pain is literally everywhere. Imagine if those sprains and bruises didn’t heal and you had to live with that pain and discomfort every day. Many of us with fibromyalgia feel like that. We use phrases such as “I feel like I got hit by a truck” or “I feel like I got beat up” because the pain is often intense and all over our body.

Fatigue

When people hear “fatigue”, they think “tired”, which is not completely accurate. To feel fatigued, a person doesn’t need to have a busy day or a sleepless night. Performing simple tasks like brushing your teeth or getting dressed are difficult and draining. And taking a shower? That’s like running a damn marathon. Some people with fibro say fatigue is similar to how run-down you feel when you have the flu. Think about the last time you were real sick with a high fever. It was tough to get out of bed and move around, right? Now think about having that feeling nearly every day, on top of the falling-down-a-flight-of-stairs pain.

Treatment

There are many different treatment methods that are used for fibromyalgia. Prescription medication, supplements, medical marijuana, acupuncture, physical therapy, and so on. What I’m about to tell you is probably the most important piece of information to remember: Everyone’s body is different. What works for one person may not help someone else. There are medications that people can’t take due to bad side effects or because it interacts with something else they’re taking. And like other illnesses, there are different severities of fibromyalgia. So please keep in mind, the treatment that worked for your brother’s neighbor’s second cousin won’t work for everyone.

Support

Support from our family and friends is incredibly important to us. I understand that it can be frustrating and/or disappointing when we can’t make it to a social function, especially if we have to cancel last minute. Please know that we don’t want to cancel. We absolutely hate having to miss out on important events. The guilt we feel is often overwhelming. It’s our illness that’s unreliable. The best thing you can do as our loved ones is to believe us and just be there for us. We need your love and support to keep us going, and for those of you who have already been doing that, we appreciate it more than words can say.

Last Words

What I’d like everyone to know is we do the best we can. We have good days and bad days, and unfortunately we have no way of knowing what tomorrow will be. We have to listen to our bodies and know our limits. If we do too much, we’ll be in bed for days. Most of us were healthy, active, and social before we were diagnosed with fibromyalgia. Having a chronic illness like this is life-changing. But we keep going because we are strong. We will continue to fight fibromyalgia every day and hope that down the road, there will be better treatments available.

If you didn’t know anything about fibromyalgia, I hope you learned something! Please support your loved ones with fibro and spread awareness!

2017 Fibromyalgia Awareness Campaign

Those of us with fibromyalgia are constantly fighting. We fight our pain and fatigue every day to be able to function. We fight for proper treatment from doctors and health care professionals. We fight through depression and anxiety. We fight for support from our family and friends. We fight through the trial and error process of various medications and treatment methods.

It’s 2017 and we need positive changes in the world of fibromyalgia!

I want to fight for ALL doctors to be better educated and informed on the latest treatment methods, techniques, and medication.

I want to fight for accurate diagnostic criteria.

I want to fight for more research.

I want to fight for patient-centered care.

I want to fight for us to be treated with more respect from everyone – doctors, nurses, family, friends, and co-workers.
During the month of May, I will be doing my best to reach as many people as I can to help them understand what this fight is about. This is more than spreading awareness. This is a fight to improve the quality of our lives. I think it’s worth fighting for.

Will you join me in the Fight for Fibro?

IMG_1097

Fibro Fighters Under 40

Over a week ago I created a new Facebook group called “Fibro Fighters Under 40”. I’ve been wanting to do it for quite some time, and I’m glad I finally did. I felt like those of us that are younger with Fibromyalgia can relate to each other better and need as much support as possible. Our age group is expected to be healthy, active, working, socializing, etc. Fibro obviously limits us from being “normal” young adults. I’m 29 (the big 3-0 in March) and I’ve found out from my own experience that most people can’t wrap their head around the fact that I’m “so young” and in pain. Nothing against older people with Fibromyalgia, of course! Anyway, there are already 50 members in my group, and I think it is already a success. The members are happy to have somewhere to vent, share, and relate to people close in age who are having similar experiences.

So, if you’re on Facebook, have Fibromyalgia, and are under 40, please join us! Here’s the link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/993810067324193/

Look forward to meeting you!

-Kristin

Pain Anxiety

Anxiety is a common disorder. Some have social anxiety, panic disorder, a specific phobia, and others, myself included, have generalized anxiety. I also have another type of anxiety that won’t be found in any medical book or website. It’s what I refer to as “pain anxiety”. I am currently anxious about how much pain and fatigue I will likely experience due to the busy and stressful couple of weeks I have ahead of me. Part of what I’m referring to is of course Christmas. The holidays are a stressful time for most people. However, managing Fibromyalgia is a full-time job in of itself and throwing Christmas into the mix of the regular daily struggles is just “ugh”. I bought all my gifts online to take away the physical aspect of shopping so I was proud of myself for that. I am not hosting any gatherings so that’s yet another thing I don’t have to worry about. The negative part is my husband and I are going to three places on Christmas Eve and two places on Christmas Day. We have to see both sides of the family which is why there are so many stops. I’ve been trying to make Christmas Eve at least two stops but I haven’t come up with a solution yet. It’s way too much for me.

The other part of my pain anxiety is about work. I just realized that starting tomorrow, I’m working nine days straight. Yes, I said nine. That’s a lot for anyone, but for me, I feel like I’m literally going to drop dead. I’m in pain just thinking about it. The first day I’ll have off is on Christmas Eve, which of course as I just explained is far from a day off. So my 2 weeks go: work nine days straight (on my feet, mind you), wake up Christmas Eve to get ready and visit three places, then Christmas Day is split between two places, then the day after Christmas I start a new work week. I’m sure the scheduling was an oversight, as I know we were trying to cover vacation days for a couple of my coworkers. But because we had enough trouble covering the shifts, I’m not sure if I can fix this and get a day off sometime in between. A regular work week is incredibly painful for me so I don’t know what this is going to feel like. Christmas is about spending time with my family, who I hardly get to see anymore, and now I likely won’t be able to enjoy myself.

Each problem by itself is tough, but put them all together and it’s a disaster. I don’t know what to do. Pain anxiety, my friends.

The Roller Coaster of Emotions

We are all emotional beings. The experiences in our lives make us feel so many different emotions. Living with a chronic illness has made me more emotional than I ever was. I feel so much not just in a week but every single day. Here’s only some of what I feel on a daily basis:

1. Frustrated. Work frustrates me to no end, but when I’m in pain, I get frustrated easily since I can’t do what I used to be able to do. Can’t pick this up, can’t sleep through the night, can’t make it to the party. GRR.

2. Annoyed. I get annoyed at loud or abrupt noises, changing temperatures, bright lights, and strong smells. They affect me more than they used to.

3. Sad. The only time I leave my house is to work. I don’t see my family and friends anymore and it upsets me. They don’t bother with me and I understand why, but it makes me sad. Being in pain makes me sad in general. It’s not fun, and there are plenty of times when it makes me cry.

4. Worthless. Most of the time I feel like there’s no point in living. I failed at my career and I’m unhappy with my job situation. I’m in constant pain and it keeps me from doing things I enjoy, and I’m losing touch with loved ones. My life is headed nowhere. 

5. Grateful. When I begin to feel worthless, I remember I have a husband, cat, and a few close family members. I am grateful to have them and I have to keep telling myself that I do have some people who care. It helps that worthless feeling fade away.

6. Anxious. I’ve had general anxiety since college, but every day I get anxious about pretty much everything. If I know it’s going to be a long day (or week) at work, I get anxious because I’m worried about my pain and how bad it might get. If I have to travel or go to an event I get anxious that I won’t feel well or enjoy myself. I never thought pain could cause so much anxiety.

7. Angry. Being in pain makes me angry. It’s a terrible feeling and I don’t know how or why I have this. I get angry that nothing helps me enough, and that I have to work full time which makes it worse. I also get angry at people who don’t think Fibro is real, or the ones who think they’re experts and tell me if I try this magical pill I’ll be cured. Just stop. 

8. Hopeful. I become hopeful for a tolerable pain day in the near future, for a change in lifestyle, and for more research and better treatments.

9. Exhausted. I’m physically and mentally exhausted every day. This is a feeling that does not go away, regardless of how well I slept or how much I rested on my day off. Pain, anxiety, stress, migraines, work… Yeah, exhaustion is permanent.

10. Ashamed. I don’t enjoy having to tell people I don’t feel well. If I can’t make it somewhere, of course I have to say something. It’s not an easy conversation to have and I still never know how to explain that I’m in severe pain. I’m ashamed to say it, especially at my age. I know the person on the other end thinks I’m being lazy or dramatic or just making an excuse. 

I’m sure some of you Fibro Fighters can relate. 

Thanks for reading.

My Fibro Story

“I’m dying to be alive, not trying to just survive”. That’s a lyric from “Dying to Be Alive”, a song by my all-time favorite band, Hanson. (Yes, Hanson). Those words have never rang more true to me than right now. I’ve been in survival mode for the past four years. I’ve had ups and downs with work and changing careers during this time, but it’s mainly been due to my health. It’s been four years since I’ve been without pain and for over 2 of those years, I didn’t know what was causing it. I went to what felt like a million doctor’s appointments and had many tests done, including X-Rays, MRIs, blood work, and even a nerve test. The tests all came back “normal”. I told one doctor that there was nothing normal about a woman in her mid-twenties experiencing constant pain. All he did was shrug and sign me up for physical therapy (which didn’t help, by the way). It wasn’t until 2014 when I was finally diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Since there is no test for Fibromyalgia, doctors have to rule out everything else before a diagnosis is made. I was happy to finally put a name to this pain that I had, but I was certainly disappointed to learn that at age 28, I have a chronic illness with no cure, that is difficult to treat, and is very misunderstood.
There are many people that don’t understand what Fibromyalgia is or don’t believe it exists. If you are one of those people, then buckle up, because I’m going to tell it like it is. Fibromyalgia is a chronic pain condition, which unfortunately means I’m not going to “feel better soon”. I don’t feel one type of pain. Sometimes I feel throbbing pain, sometimes I feel shooting pain, and sometimes it feels like part of me is on fire. The pain is in my joints, muscles, and nerves. People with Fibromyalgia have what doctors call “tender points”, which are the areas of the body that are the most sensitive and painful. The worst ones for me are the knees, back, elbows, neck and shoulder blades. I also have what are called “flare-ups”, which are periods of time when the pain is at its highest and it is absolutely unbearable. Those times are when literally everything hurts, even my skin. Flare-ups can last for a day or several days and usually occur during periods of stress, overexertion, or hormonal changes. There are days which I refer to as “tolerable” when the pain isn’t severe, but it never goes away. Aside from pain, fatigue, difficulty sleeping, anxiety and migraines are other common symptoms of Fibromyalgia, all of which I deal with as well. I manage my symptoms with medication, but because I’m constantly overexerting myself, I likely don’t feel as much relief as I should. Like any condition, each individual’s experience may be different so pain levels, response to medication and treatment, and other symptoms may vary. It is hard for people to believe that I’m in chronic pain. I’m 29 years old now so I’m young and I “look fine”. Not every condition calls for a cane or a wheelchair. Millions of people suffer with depression and anxiety every day. Those are real illnesses, right? So is Fibromyalgia. Just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it isn’t there.
The reason for my “constant overexertion” that I mentioned before is my job. I’m a certified pharmacy technician in a retail pharmacy and I work full-time. In addition to the job being mentally stressful, I’m on my feet between 8 and 9 hours each day. I don’t have a typical Monday – Friday, 9-5 schedule. It varies week to week and I don’t have consecutive days off, so getting into a routine and getting enough rest is difficult. My husband and I live paycheck to paycheck to make ends meet so I need to work and can’t reduce my hours. I will admit that there are days when the pain is so bad that I know I can’t last the day. I’m ashamed when I have to leave work early because of pain. I end up feeling guilty instead of being satisfied that I’m taking care of myself. I hate letting down my team, and I feel like they don’t believe me. I know my job isn’t exactly “Fibro Friendly”, but there aren’t many options out there for me. It’s tough to find work in general so this is all I have right now. Overall, I push through because I know I have to, but it is a struggle every single day.
Fibromyalgia has most definitely turned my life upside-down. Most people my age get home from work and cook dinner, go out and run errands, maybe do some cleaning, or even meet a friend for happy hour. Once I’m done with my shift, I’m in severe pain and my body has shut down. I immediately get changed and get into bed. Sometimes I don’t eat dinner because the pain and exhaustion have taken away my appetite. Aside from work, daily tasks are difficult to manage as well. Taking a shower is like running a marathon. It takes so much out of me that when I’m done, I have to sit down for a while in my towel before I get dressed. Regular household chores like laundry, vacuuming, and making the bed are draining. Shopping is avoided at all costs. (Yes, I’m serious). Cooking doesn’t happen too much either. My social life is pretty much non-existent. I have family and friends but I don’t see them much. I tend to only go out on special occasions. I use up all my energy at work and after that I have nothing left in the tank. Trust me, it’s not how I want it. I’d much rather be having fun than be stuck in bed.
Having a support system is important when you live with chronic pain. Mine isn’t a big group, but I’m fortunate to have the support of a couple people. My husband has learned more about my condition as time went on and he knows what my limits are. He’s there to listen and will do what he can to help, like the grocery shopping and other household chores I’m unable to do. My mom has been very supportive as well, but that’s nothing new. She’s been there for me my entire life, but I’ve never needed her more than I do now. She can relate to me due to her own condition which is similar to Fibro, so it helps to talk to someone who truly understands. Mom’s always just a phone call away and I’m grateful for that. I’m lucky to have them in my life and I am dead serious when I say that they are the reason why I’m still here today.
The main reason I want to share my story is to make more people aware of what Fibromyalgia is and the major effect it can have on someone’s life. I want others with Fibro to be believed by their family, friends and physicians. The more people who are educated about this syndrome, the more likely that more research will be done, and eventually better treatments will become available. I know that people who don’t have Fibromyalgia will never truly be able to understand, but an acceptance of our condition would go a long way. The judgments need to stop. The invisible illness that is Fibromyalgia needs to become visible. Writing this post wasn’t easy because I mostly feel embarrassed to say I’m in pain. Many people immediately think “drama-queen”, so I try to keep my Fibro conversations limited. I want to put this out there for others who are going through a similar situation too. Make sure you have some good distractions. Keep fighting, even when you feel like giving up. It’s not easy, but I hope someday we won’t have to fight as hard. 

Acceptance

I worked Monday and Tuesday this week and on Wednesday I went to Boston with my husband. We took the train in and arrived around 11, checked in to the hotel, had lunch, and went back to the hotel for a couple hours to rest. Around 4 we had dinner and drinks then went to the Red Sox game. We had a great time and it felt SO good to be away. We could only afford to stay one night, so Thursday morning we checked out, had lunch, then took the train home. I thought I was very smart on this trip. We took a cab to and from the train station/hotel, and our hotel was barely a 2 minute walk to Fenway Park. I did that on purpose so I didn’t wear myself out. When I woke up in the hotel Thursday I felt like I got hit by a bus. My guess was I was stiff from the 2 and 1/2 hour train ride and the hard seats at Fenway. I kind of expected to feel yucky that morning though. But it continued to get worse. The train ride home was so uncomfortable and of course it felt like forever until we got home. I went to bed early that night since I felt terrible, but I also had to work at 8 am the next morning.

Friday morning I still felt like hell. Luckily I only worked 8-2. Problem was I had plans to go see Taylor Swift in concert on Saturday at Metlife Stadium in New Jersey. She got tickets nearly a year ago for both of us and a bunch of her family members and I didn’t realize the Boston trip and Taylor Swift were in the same week. Also, when I agreed to go to the concert, my pain wasn’t nearly what it is now. To be honest, I was worried about the concert for awhile. I love Taylor Swift and I love my friend. It was everything else. The venue is an hour and a half away, but on top of it, we were going to leave around noon, meet up with her family, then head to the venue to tailgate before the show. There’s an 8 hour day right there before the concert even starts. So Saturday morning arrives and I’m crying in pain. There is no possible way I can go to this thing. I dreaded telling my friend, who was psyched for the concert, but I had no choice. Luckily, she wasn’t mad. She felt bad that I was in so much pain. Her family was going so at least it didn’t effect her as much. I just felt bad canceling on such a big event.

As I said, these plans were made almost a year ago which is why I was in that predicament. I don’t actually go anywhere but work and home anymore. As for Boston, that was booked well in advance too. But I went with my husband and I moved at my own pace. Sadly, I still paid for it. I can’t have fun for one night without suffering the consequences of pain, no matter how many precautions I take. It sucks. The reality is my life has changed completely. I can’t work and have a social life because my body can’t handle it. Work exhausts me and causes me great pain. Sometimes people will ask me to go somewhere after work and I’m like “are they out of their freakin’ minds?” I can’t wrap my head around the fact that people have the energy to go out after work, or to work all week and have all these big weekend plans. It hurts me just to think about it.

So yesterday, as I was laying in bed all day on a gorgeous summer Saturday while the rest of the world was at the beach, taking walks, and seeing Taylor Swift in concert, I sadly accepted my new life. I’ve gone through the stages of grief and finally reached acceptance. My name is Kristin and I have fibromyalgia. I suffer from widespread chronic pain, fatigue, depression, and frequent migraines. I am not the same person I was even last year. My relationships with my family and friends aren’t the same. I barely talk to them anymore. My husband and parents are the only ones I associate with. My husband helps me as much as he can when he’s not working, and my parents (mostly my mom) check in and try to help as well. I wouldn’t have spoken with my friend if it weren’t for the concert. The other few friends I have are too busy with their lives, doing fun things (as they should) so I don’t hear from them. Even my other family members don’t call anymore. They all know about my pain but clearly they don’t care. I’ve been there for everyone through all the good and the bad. I’ve never given up on my loved ones. So in addition to everything else, I’m heartbroken.

I’m going to spend my day off in bed again and get as much rest as I can to prepare for 40 hours of work on my feet. *sigh*… I don’t know how much longer I can do this.

Thanks for reading.

Moving is painful. Literally.

So as I said in a earlier post, we closed on our condo on Friday after a very long, drawn out process to get our mortgage loan. We couldn’t be happier that all that bs is over. We began to move boxes in on Friday night with the help of my in-laws. It was so nice of them and saved us some trips. We’ve been slowly moving stuff in but it’s been hard with our work schedules not lining up. We stayed at the condo late last night unpacking and I woke up today feeling awful. I should’ve rested all day and instead went to a couple stores to get some things we need. I have a 10-hour work day tomorrow, then I’m off Tuesday with my husband for our official move-in day. We’re getting our bed, mattress, couch, and dining set delivered so it’ll be our first night there. I work Wednesday and Thursday and then have Friday-Sunday off. 

I am so tired I can’t see straight, and the pain is so bad I don’t have words to describe it. I’m throbbing everywhere. Tomorrow is going to be rough, and even though I’m off Tuesday, it’s not exactly a day of relaxation. I’ve definitely done way more than I should have in this moving process. Carrying boxes that were too heavy, bending over too much, all the unpacking/organizing… I couldn’t let my husband do everything. He’s done so much already and I want to feel like I helped. Now I’m paying for it of course. I thought I would’ve had more time to rest this weekend. Can’t wait until Friday when I can finally be in my home so I can rest and not worry about anything. Gonna be a loooong week.

Thoughts on Fibromyalgia Awareness Day

Let me begin by saying I am 1000% for spreading awareness for fibromyalgia. I think it should be as well known and understood by people like arthritis or breast cancer. I’m so tired of it being the “invisible illness”. I’m part of the National Fibromyalgia Association and they sent an e-mail (and probably posted on Facebook too) about Fibromyalgia Awareness Day 2015. Here is the body of the e-mail:

“Dear Friend of the NFA,

If you love cooking, entertaining your friends, and supporting a worthy cause, then this event is worth your time and energy.

Feast Friendship and HOPE for Fibromyalgia Awareness 2015

NFA’s Feast, Friendship and HOPE event is to commemorate 2015 National Fibromyalgia Awareness Day (May 12th) and promote education and understanding of this life-altering condition. Please invite your friends to your home for a fundraising dinner, father at your favorite restaurant, or even have a cocktail party. Whatever you choose, your efforts will help to make fibromyalgia visible and more research possible.

Simply invite your friends, colleagues and family to your gathering and ask them to make a contribution – either through the NFA’s website or right there at your party. Make sure you take lots of pictures or video and share your experience with the FM community on the NFA’s social media pages.

You can host your own even between now and May 12th, 2015.

Your “Feast Friendship and HOPE” for Fibromyalgia event will help the NFA continue to support our community through social media as we reach those individuals in need of new resources and hope.”

Ok. I’m glad there’s an awareness day for us fibro fighters. I really am. But inviting friends over and asking them to make a donation? That’s just downright awkward… at least to me. I could never do that. There are so many of us who not only struggle with pain every day, but with our loved ones and colleagues not understanding our illness. I know awareness days for other illnesses involve walking/running, which the majority of us can’t do, so the NFA was trying to be creative. I wish I had a better idea, and I’m not trying to put down the NFA or insult anyone, but there has to be a better way. We need ads on television aside from Lyrica commercials that are just awful. (I take Lyrica, I just hate the way it’s advertised). We need national and international attention. We need TONS of research. And we need understanding. If I did this “Feast, Friendship and HOPE” thing, I’d not only feel awkward, but it would seem like I want my friends/family to feel sorry for me, which is of course not what I want at all. I’m sure this could be done for some people who have a strong support system, but for myself and many others, we can’t participate.

Does anyone have thoughts or opinions about this? Please feel free to comment, I’d love to hear what others think.

Thanks for reading.

Struggling

I’ve been wanting to post something all week but I’ve been exhausted and in pain. Work was stressful this week. It’s not enough that my job is physically tough for me. It’s also mentally draining. Dealing with the public isn’t easy, to put it simply. Most of the people that come in are rude, demanding, and impatient. There is no reason for anyone to scream at me (especially when I didn’t do anything wrong). That type of behavior is disgusting. It was like that all week. It seemed like 9/10 interactions with customers were negative. First of all, I don’t deserve to be disrespected. I work hard and go out of my way for people all the time. Second of all, I get paid a very low hourly wage so honestly, I don’t get paid enough for this s**t.

My pain level for the past couple weeks has been through the roof. I know part of it is because I worked three 40-hour weeks in a row. My bank account is smiling, but my body is crying. Also, there was Easter, a concert, and dealing with details concerning the closing on my condo. We are closing on Friday, the 24th, as far as we know. This process has been incredibly stressful from start to finish. Nothing went smoothly. Even the simple things were extra work. It’s been a nightmare, but it’s almost over. And then comes the fun part: actually moving. HA. Thank God for my husband, who unfortunately will be doing most of the labor. I will do what I can, but I really can’t lift or carry much of anything. Our condo is on the second floor too, so it’s going to be a real challenge for me. I was able to take one day off for when the furniture gets delivered. That’s it. That’ll be our first night in our new home, which includes transitioning my cat into a new environment. Then the next day we both have to get up early and go to work. And leave my poor cat alone in a new place. I tried to take that following day off but there’s no one to cover my shift.

I’m happy I have today and tomorrow off, but I have a lot to do. I’m in the process of doing laundry right now, but I have to go through more clothes and make donation bags for things I don’t want/don’t fit anymore. Then the worst part will be sifting through all my paperwork. My parents have a shredder and I’m sure I’ll be borrowing that. I have to organize everything into folders and throw out or shred what I don’t need.

With all that said, all I want to do is rest. I’m beyond exhausted and I’m in severe pain. I hurt everywhere. I want to cry. I haven’t really told anyone how bad the pain has been because I don’t know how to describe it. Not to mention, no one understands. My husband tries, but as anyone with fibro knows, unless you have it, it’s extremely hard to describe. The “I feel like I got hit by a truck” description only goes so far. There’s so much going on right now and I can’t take anymore, mentally or physically.

Thanks for reading.11148659_1084056321611741_8463525799085809100_n