I’m thankful tomorrow is Friday, and 7pm (the end of my shift) can’t come soon enough. As I’ve mentioned in previous posts, my job is tough on my body, having to be on my feet the whole time. To say I’m in pain is an understatement.
I have Saturday and Sunday off, but Saturday I actually have plans with my friends (for once). I’m going to see Miranda Lambert in concert at Mohegan Sun Casino with two of my best friends. This will be the 5th time the three of us will be seeing her together so it’s become kind of a fun tradition to go whenever Miranda comes to CT. I’m in dire need of a night out with my girls since all I do is work and stay home to rest… but (did you sense a “but” coming?) it’s quite a big deal for anyone who suffers from chronic pain/fatigue. We’re leaving around 4-4:30 and it takes about an hour to get there. Concern #1 – stiffness in the car. The concert begins around 7:30 or 8 (not sure on the exact time but pretty sure that’s accurate) so we’ll have a few hours to eat, have drinks, and walk around. Concern #2 – SO much walking. I don’t want to sound like a baby (or an elderly woman for that matter) and say to my friends “No, I don’t want to go there, it’s too far of a walk”, or “Can we stop and sit for awhile?”…. I’ll feel like such a buzzkill. But it’s a legit concern. There are seats in the concert venue so that’s a good thing. But this is quite a big outing for me. Concern #3 – Recovery. Thankfully I have Sunday off, but I’m worried about how bad I’m going to feel after all of this. I’ll be recovering from a long, draining work week and a big night out? In one day? To then wake up on Monday and begin yet another 40 hour work week? I hurt even more just thinking about it.
The sad part of all this is that I have all these concerns. I can’t just be excited to spend time with friends and see one of my favorite musicians perform. I’m sure I’ll have fun, and I am definitely in need of a few drinks after this crappy week, but I feel pathetic. And once again, what makes it even more difficult is that my friends don’t understand. They don’t know how much worse this has gotten, nor do they realize this is chronic. It’s not going away.
I do hope I enjoy myself, especially since I can’t remember the last time I did anything social. I just have to stay in bed on Saturday until I absolutely have to get up and get ready.
I wonder how many of you fibro fighters can relate…
Thanks for reading.
Song of the Day: Sia – Chandelier – “But I’m holding on for dear life, won’t look down, won’t open my eyes. Keep my glass full until morning light ’cause I’m just holding on for tonight”